For anyone who swims laps at a shared pool there is usually one thought when setting foot on the pool deck: Please let there be an open lane. An open lane means you can swim at your own pace and do your own stroke. There is no risk of whacking someone when you careen off course during the backstroke, and you certainly won't kick anyone in the side during an overzealous breaststroke. Young swimmers don't have to worry about disrespectfully splashing past the older ones, and slow swimmers don't have to feel intimidated by the Phelps look-alike who has mastered flip turns and the butterfly. If there's an open lane.
But sometimes there isn't. In this case, swim buddies will often opt to 'circle' a lane which means swimming in tandem on the right side of the lane...down on the right, back on the right, thus forming a circle... This works well for swimmers of similar speeds who know each other. For the buddy-less, one must assess the situation, sizing up lane occupants to determine who might be the best to split a lane. (Splitting is when two swimmers stick to their own sides of the lane.)
Recently I was the buddy-less swimmer facing a pool without an empty lane. Lanes 1 and 2 were out. The former had children and swim instructors, and the latter had two men already splitting the lane. Lane 6, which for whatever reason is my preferred lane, had a jogger. She was sticking to one side of the lane, but I just didn't think it was fair to subject her to my splashing. That left three lanes. In Lane 5, we had what I will call 'the haphazard swimmer.' Like all of my athletic pursuits, I am average at best. I am not particularly fast or graceful, but I pray I do not fall into the 'haphazard' swimmer category. The haphazard swimmer does not believe in the vertical line of swimming. Or even if he does, his arms and legs do not obey. Sharing a lane with a haphazard swimmer is more likely to result in a blow to the head or a swift kick to the ribs. So don't go there if you don't have to.
In Lane 3, there was an older gentleman who was swimming down the center of the lane. I just didn't want to bother him. The best candidate was in Lane 4. I had split a lane with him before, for only a few minutes before there was an opening. He is a fast, fluid swimmer that is considerate when sharing a lane. The only problem? He can swim for yards and yards without stopping. Some swimmers will just get into the lane, but I like to wait until the person comes up for a rest, then ask permission to share. It's just the polite thing to do, I think. But he just kept flipping and flipping and flipping. I gave up and asked the guy in Lane 3 if we could split. As I mentioned, he was older and possibly hard of hearing out of the pool. So I had to practically scream at his waterclogged ears, "Can we split the lane?" He finally replied, "I'm leaving in a few minutes." Ummm...so was that a yes or a no? Off he went, and I wasn't sure if he would think I was rude for not waiting until he finished or if he hadn't really heard what I said. I turned back to Lane 4...here he comes...and...flip! Damn. I was about to ambush the jogger when Lane 3 returned, and said, "Well you can get in. No sense sitting there." So we split for a few minutes, until he headed off to the locker room. And I was free to do a haphazard backstroke down Lane 3.
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